Urdu Funny Jokes, Part-05

Teacher: Bijli kahan se ati hai??
Student: Mairy mamo ke ghar se
Teacher: Wo kaisy?
Student: Jab bhi bijli jati hai, mairy papa kahty hain, “Saalon ne phir bijli band kardi”

Mareez: Doctor sahib mujhy door ka nazar nahi ata !
Doctor: Asman par dekho, wo kia hai??
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Mareez: Chand
Doctor: abhe es se agay kia farishty dekhega??

Height of Doubt
Shouhar: Mai tumhary sath 100 sal rahonga owr pyar karonga
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Bewi: Usky baad kahan mun marny ka irada hai??

Devdas of 2011
Abbu Ne Kaha “Night Package” Chor do
Maa Ne kaha “Facebook” Chor do
Doston Ne kaha mobile se balance churana chor do
Paro Ne kaha tum fail hogaye ho mujhe chor do
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Owr
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Ek din ayega jab girlfriend ky bachy bolenge
Mamo ab tu hamari Ammi ka peecha chor do

Wife (Kitchen se): A jee suntay ho? Aaj kal mai boht khubsurat ho rahi hon..
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Husband: Tumhe kaise pata chala??
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Wife: Aaj kal mairi khubsurati daikh kar rotiyan bhi jal rahi hain.

Question: Shadi ke waqt dulhay ko gorhay par kion bethaya jata hai??
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Answer: Last warning di jati hai, ke abhi bhi waqt hai bhaag ja

Baap ne baity se kaha: ‘daikho yai aaj tumhari teacher ki taraf se mujhy 1 letter mila hai……”
Baita:”aap bay-fikar rahain, main ammi ko nahi bataon ga

Teacher: Your Son is intelligent But Spends a lot of Time Thinking About Girls
Mother: If You Find a Solution, Please Advise me, His Father has the Same Problem

Funny but Meaningful
Teacher: Beta Tumhary Abbu kia karty hain??
Bacha: Jo Ammi kahti hain

Ek admi ne dozak mai shetan se kaha
“kia mai apke mobile se apni bewi ko call karsakta hon?”
Call karne ke baad admi bola: Call ke kitny paise don?
Shetan bola:No charge, because hell to hell is free

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Funny Urdu Jokes, Part-18

ek buzurg kisi kay ghar tashreef lay gaee sara khandan baba jee pas jama thaa ksi nay shan main gustakhi kar di. theek 10 mint bad sara khandan andha ho gaya aur zoor zoor say ronay aur chillany laga, baba jee hamain maaf kar do hum par raham karoo atnay main baba je uthayy aur joti uthai aur sub ko ek ek lagaee aur farmaya…
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kambakhto light chali gaee.

1 Aurat Aadhi Raat Ko Qabar Pr Baithi Thi
Musafir Ne Pocha: Darr Nhi Lgta?
Aurat: Lo Is Me Da
e Ki Kya Baat Hy
Andar Garmi Thi Is Liye Bahir Bethi Hon =P =D

Girl: Main us Aadmi se shaadi kar0n gi, Jo sara din laga rahy magr us sy kch na ho. . .
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Boy: Misbah pe nazar hy teri haan… =P
Bari tezz hy tu? =D

Misbah:
Hm Sachin Ko Ksi Hal Me 100th Century Nai Bnany Daingy
Gull: Mgar Hm Usy Rokenge Kese,Wo To Fit Or Form Me Hy
Misbah: Hm 90 Pe All Out Ho Jayenge

Girl : Paros wali Aunty mujhe bohat tang karti theen..
Jab b kisi ki Shadi hoti wo mere gaal kheench k kehti
“AB TUMHARI BARI HAI”
Phir mainay un ki ye aadat khatam karwa di.
Friend : Kaise ?
Girl:Jab koi Mar jata tou mai un k Gaal kheench k kehti…
“AB AAP KI BARI HAI”

can u read fast in english !
MY
A my
They my
They they my
A my they na my.
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..
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Khulay nahi hain maaf karo:.

hasarat e deedar ki khatir us k muhaly main easeload ki shop khol li roz 1 naya shaks us k namr py 100 ka load kawa jata hy mohabbat na mili shop chal pare

Main Ne Jo Apni Girl Friend Ko Kaha
Kay PARDAY Mein Raha Karo Jaan.
Us Ne Police Ko Keh Diya
My Boy Friend Iz Taalibaan.
(‘.’)
//”/\ Oh Teri
_/”\_ Khair.

TEACHER:
Ek Aisa Sentence Batao Jis Mein URDU, HINDI, PUNJABI AUR ENGLISH Ka Sahi Use Hua Ho …
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…
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SARDAR:
ISHQ DI GALI VICH NO ENTRY.

*. . .Agar teen din tak subha neend se jag ker kangha na kia jaye to hair style Veena Malik jesa ho jata hai..
*. . .Zubaida Apa k stylish totkey. . .*

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Funny Urdu Jokes, Part-13

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Funny Urdu Jokes, Part-24

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Funny Urdu Jokes, Part-12

Teacher: Es mohawary ko Jumlay mai estimal karo
“Mun mai pani ana”
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Sardar Student: Jese hi mai ne nal ko mun se lag kar nal chalo kia tu mere mun mai pani agia

Sardar ko Gali mai 100 rupey ka note mela
Note ke oper lekha tha “EID MUBARAK”
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Sardar ne idhar udhar dekha,
owr Note Jaib mai rakthy howe bola
“KHAIR MUBARAK”

Sardar to Son: Ja Puttar ek glass pani le ke aa
Son: Sorry abba mai nahi ja sakda
2nd Son: Abba ae te hai e chawal, to aap le ke aa

Sardar darakht pe ulta latka howa tha
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Friend: Tu darakht pe kion latka hai?
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Sardar: Sar dard ki goli khayi hai kahen pait mai na chali jaye

Sardar ankhain band karky Ayena (mirror) ke samny khara hogia
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Bewi ne pocha; Yai kia kar rahy ho?
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Sardar: Daikh raha ke mai sotay howe kesa lagta hon

Sardar was painting his room
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Us ne Chat ko paint karkay
Diwaron par likha
“SAME AS ABOVE”

Sardar and his wife applied in court for Divorce
Judge: How will you divide, you have 3 kids.
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Sardar:ok, we should next year !

Police: Tumhari wife ghum howi to tum ne Police ko kion nahi bataya?
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Saradar: O Jee pahly scooter ghum howa tha to police ne 20 din chala ke wapis ki thi.

Sardar to Wife: Light nahi hai tu phankh tu chala do
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Wife: Akhir sardar hi ho na, aqal tu hai hi nahi, phanka chalayenge tu moom-batti bujh jayegi

Hitlar during Speech: Mairi dictionary mai IMPOSSIBLE ka lafz nahi
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Sardar Uth ke bola: tay mama waikh ke laini ci na Dictionary!

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